//

No going back, no, we’re starting again
And I’m only talking to a couple friends
I really don’t mean to offend
I just need space to clear up my head
All your prayers are appreciated
Cause it feels like my soul is vacant
I got some time and I’m just tryna save it
But I don’t know if I’m gonna make it

Anyway anyway somebody lemme go
Ain’t need to hear everything I already know
Just wanna know what I better be ready for
Plus maybe why me and God ain’t talk anymore
No need to panic, I’ll handle the weight
It’s almost routine, cause I never break
I wish that I would
And I wish that I could
But not yet, so I get to wait
Tryna be authentic but I wanna impress you
Bout to drop out cause of Jarod, bless you
It’s a long story, I’ll explain later
With a drawing board and a blank paper
Go do your thing and I’ll do mine
And we’ll get together in due time
But right now, I just need to sob
No, Selah, come save me God

No going back, no, we’re starting again
And I’m only talking to a couple friends
I really don’t mean to offend
I just need space to clear up my head
All your prayers are appreciated
Cause it feels like my soul is vacant
I got some time and I’m just tryna save it
But I don’t know if I’m gonna make it

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//

It feels good to see the chaos again 
It’s been a while since we talked, how you doing, old friend? 
Nah I don’t mean to be offensive, y’all just ain’t on my level 
And greatness is the goal, you can’t convince me to settle 
Recall it’s not a job, it’s a gift, I thought “I’m better than this” 
Nah I don’t care about hits, yeah I just hope they don’t miss 
All the details, but I know it can be boring 
So I’ll skip a few things, cause it’s a long story 
Went sorta suicidal for a second or two 
No I was screaming through my phone thinking “what do I do?” 
I had to feel the darkness to reach out for the light 
But I know that there’s still a part of me that don’t wanna fight 
Man I’m just tryna grow up in the place that I’m at 
I’m still lost in California, but I’m tryna get back 
Yeah it might take some time, but I think we’re gonna make it 

So thank you for your patience 

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//

Five years ago I started all of this 
I wonder how long it’s gonna take for them to want to be part of this 
I think I’m over thinking things 
We know what overthinking brings 
God bless the pen cause here we go again 
I can only start from where I am, but Lord it ain’t pretty 
There’s a storm on the horizon between me and the city 
But if I wait till it dies down, I’ll never get started 
So welcome to the game, I won’t be begging your pardon 
No, fly butterfly in the face of the wind 
It blows a little bit harder when you’re created to win 
I know where I’m headed, but it’s just taking some time 
Cause it’s all uphill, but see I’m ready to climb 
I know the destination, but the details evade me 
Will I be chasing the daylight? Will they be thinking I’m crazy? 
But they already do, so I might as well try, yeah 
Who's it gonna hurt if I go broke and I die? 
But I’m the golden child, He can’t have me fail 
I’m a hero to my hometown, so I gotta prevail 
I’m hailing from the Shyre, got a team that I inspire 
Nature Valley safety rally will set’em all on fire 
If you know you know, this time I’m ready to go 
Ain’t no stopping me now, i threw my scarlet in snow 
So I better get going before I get out of hand 
Nah I don’t wanna be the one to mess up all of the plans 
But there’s chaos in my mind, I wish that I could get out of it 
They say God don’t need perfection, but I’m honestly doubting it 
Cause it feels like He don’t really wanna talk right now 
They say that it’s a lie, but I’m so lost right now 
It’s crazy what can change in a minute or two 
Gimme a minute or two, and I’ll be out of this mood 
It’s know about time to get out this cocoon 
But I know I shouldn’t want to try to fly too soon 
Don’t rush but don’t delay, my heart leads me astray 
I'm trying to use my brain, but it’s just more of the same 
I thought that I had it, but now it feels like I lost it 
It’s a never-ending cycle and I wish I could stop it 

What doesn't kill me better run 
Three, two, one, ready or not, no here I come 
I ain't stopping, I'm going until it's done 
I ain't hiding no more, I'm stepping out in the sun 
I'mma be fighting this war, already cocking my gun 
And I'm going for the headshots, I don't got no time to waste 
I don't need another person tryna throttle my pace 
Man, I hope you understand the race is only begun 
And if y'all just let me fly then we gon' have fun 
Cause I'm at it again with a pad and a pen 
And you better believe that I battle to win 
You don't understand what I been going through 
But that's alright cause I have been growing, no 
Who do you think that I am? What do you think is the plan? 
It don't really matter cause you are not me, and I am not you 
So don't ever tell me tell me that I am a fool 
Create for the Creator, but I'm just an imitator 
Something's about to happen, I guess we'll know a bit later 
All your prayers are appreciated, thank you for your patience 
Now if y'all could call me Clark from the moment you play this 
Cause I'm not the kid you used to know 
Died without a funeral 
Know it's quite unusual 
But honestly it's beautiful 
Feels good for the first time in a long time to be me 
Cause I know that I'm becoming who He wants me to be
Clark Clark Clark, yeah I ain't missing the mark 
And y'all can think what you want, but it feels good to restart 
I understand that y'all don't see my vision here 
But gimme a couple years, and it'll all be clear 
It's light and it's shadow, I'mma be fighting this battle 
And they'll judge, but I ain't scared of the sight of the gavel 
No it's beauty and chaos and y'all can think that I'm way off 
But I know where I'm going and I can't wait for the payoff (yeah) 
So here we go, I'mma circle the city 
I might get a little lost, but I know God is with me 
Understand that on this carousel I'm painting my dreams 
Yeah it's a long story, but you'll see what I mean 

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But isn't there a disconnect? The beauty is a misdirect 
I'm looking right and looking left and everything is such a mess 
But y'all know that I won't accept anything less than second-best 
I ain't got time for any stress, cause y'all know that I'm heaven-sent 
Nah, see I was made for this 
Do it cause I love it cause you know I ain't get paid for this 
Got some people who are gonna pray for this 
And some who ain't gon' stay for this 
But where I am is great, so I should take some time to savor it 
Nah it's crazy what can change in a year 
Man I had to quit flying in the safe and the clear 
Almost quit a couple times, so I'm glad that I'm here 
But now I'm getting down to business, ain't got time for no fear 
Gotta show'em that I want it, gotta prove to myself 
That I was really born for this, I can't loosen my belt 
No I can't sit back, I ain't got time to relax 
I'll enjoy the show when I'm on stage and we hit the cap 
It used to be a hobby but I've started to grind 
No I know I gotta hustle, I can't waste any time 
The days of underselling, I'm leaving'em all behind 
You can see what's on my face, but you can't read what's on my mind, no 
Yeah it's a process and it's slow but it's steady 
I'm just getting warmed up, y'all can save the confetti 
No it's gonna take some time, but it's gon' be deadly 
Cause your darling's on his way, and ain't nobody ready

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Yeah I ain’t gon’ lie, the winter’s been kinda weird 
Took the jump then I fell at the start of the year 
Yeah my mental vacation and academic probation have got me 
Worried bout my relevance to the population, nah 
See I been out here thinking that I’m destined to make it 
But then I dropped out of my college, ain’t no time to be vacant, yeah 
So tell me is it God, Stuart Clark, or is it Satan 
That’s been tearing me apart? I can’t even explain it, nah 
I wish that tears would fall, but you know that ain’t how it goes 
Am I making Premonitions? cause I feel so Alone 
Back in heavensent I said that I was ready to go 
All “fly, butterfly, in the scarlet in the snow”, yeah 
No tell me what that means cause I don’t even really know 
It’s a long story, right? Yeah, we’ll see how it grows 
It’s something bout a child, butterfly, and a ghost 
Man I’m sorry, please ignore me, I’ll just get my stuff and go 

Tut tut, it looks like rain
Snow’s falling, but it’s melting away
Clouds all up in the sky and my brain 
It’s a marshmallow world turned slushy and gray
Hands freeze, but I’m numb to the pain
I been thinking I got nothing to say
Last year I was picking my main 
This year it feels like I been losing my way 

I think I lost myself inside this mind of mine, I’m paralyzed and 
Terrified cause last night I was thinking “It’s my time to die” 
But really it was just time for me to get some sleep 
And I could never do it, i’m too good to be beat
But anyway I’m back, go thank Tyler for that 
My soul died for a while but God resurrected that 
Ain’t no heresy here, man I’ll be praying through my fear 
Cause I know He’ll come through, California pull him near
Ain’t no time to waste, got a lot of things at stake 
Listening to Narrowgate, tryna channel LMK 
Man my intuition was great, just listen to Change 
I swear it’s gon’ be crazy when we get up on the stage
But having said that it’s been time for me to grind 
We’ll be smoothing out the edges til the diamond in me shines 
When I wake up in the spring, the butterfly is gonna fly 
And I fell but I’mma rise, I’m a phoenix in my prime 

Tut tut, it looks like rain
Snow’s falling, but it’s melting away
Clouds all up in the sky and my brain 
It’s a marshmallow world turned slushy and gray
Hands freeze, but I’m numb to the pain
I been thinking I got nothing to say
Last year I was picking my main 
This year it feels like I been losing my way

Tut tut, it looks like rain
Snow’s falling, but it’s melting away
Clouds all up in the sky and my brain 
It’s a marshmallow world turned slushy and gray
Hands freeze, but I’m numb to the pain
Man I was thinking I got nothing to say
Last year I was picking my main 
But this year it feels like I’ll be finding my way 

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//

Time to rise and then shine again 
And then write in pen 
Understand your environment 
Learn to dance, and then firebend 
Meditate when you're mired and 
Demonstrate your desire 
To set the future on fire, no 
Write the rhymes then retire 
No honestly, this is all for me 
Masters are like my property 
I wanna feel like I'll wake up and 
Realize it was all a dream 
I'm writing this like poetry 
Letting myself be flowing free 
Emphasizing fluidity 
Analyzing stupidity 
No this is just my 5AM wake-up call 
Punch a diamond every day and soon you're break through the wall 
Nah a little bit of paper won't do much to break the fall 
Gotta get my money right so I don't wreck and lose it all 
Take that how you wanna take it 
Lil homie feelin' vacant 
Way too often felt the same 
It's hard to feel like we gon' make it 
Hard to say and hard to know 
Like Schrödinger, it's yes and no 
Where am I from? Where will I go? 
Does anybody know
Makes me wanna change the blue and white to black and gold 
Understand that I'm a better person when it gets cold 
I wanna be an elder in the culture when I'm grey and old 
Don't wanna sit and rot regretting stories left untold 
I'm tryna tell'em all now, I'll catch up on echo
But I gotta run to work cause the I'm getting the bread, so 
I'm excited for the future but I ain't gonna pretend tho 
It feels like all the homies and gettin' the memo 
But it's fine cause twenty-nine is when I'll cash in on the time 
That I spent waking up at five to make a beat and write a rhyme 
So I can wait a few more years for them to see and realize 
That to me this ain't a game, I'm in music for life
So I'mma zone out for the next four years 
And I'll be hoping and praying that it'll be worth the tears 
Cause it seems I'm going pro from this moment right here 
So I'll see y'all in twenty-one, it's time to kick it in gear 

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//

It’s your favorite local Felicia 
Your second-favorite golden child 
Third-favorite prodigal son 
My mind’s a little wild 
I been stuck inside this echo echo echo echo chamber 
Gotta get my thoughts out of this echo echo echo chamber 
That’s one down, got a few more to go 
Need to figure out the reason for the scarlet and the snow 
Couldn’t speak for a while, so my mind got to roam 
Clark’s Quiet Hours were quite a storm under the dome 
Dark then light then dark just like an Oreo, Lordy no 
Don’t compare yourself to something people like, here’s the Holy Ghost 
To remind you that your life’s a wave pattern like an orbital 
So you already know how the story goes 
Hi, I’m Stuart Clark and I don’t care what you call me 
Just don’t say that I’m a rapper, cause I feel like a phony 
As a matter of fact, nah let’s not even mention music 
Cause I don’t wanna justify to you all of what I been doing 
So let’s drop the subject 
Ask about the hoodie and I’ll talk above it 
Now I got so high off fake humility, you got me bugging 
It’s a tug of war between my life and my career 
Between my wife and foreign air 
Between the echo and the clear 
But let’s triple down on that train of thought, GaryV 
But I’m just tryna shake it up a lil like Barry B 
But berry be they calling me down in Buckhead 
I’m tryna get enough bread to up and dip to a new space 
Maybe hop across the pond 
And then try to find a place where I feel like I belong 
They say home is where the heart is, but I think that mine got lost 
Somewhere between Gwinnett Place and College Mall 
Man, I’m just tryna find where I’m meant to be 
Pretty soon I’ll be moving to the CLT 
So I’m hoping it’ll bring me all the clarity 
That I been wanting since February, 2018, yeah 
Never mind and whatever, I’m tryna write all these letters 
And I think I mighta met her, so now I’m tryna get better 
Cause feeling fettered ain’t for me, I’m shutting my eyes 
So I don’t ever feel the need to shut the blinds 
But that’s besides the point, I’m tryna get a Behind The Boards 
I’m tryna get where I’m striving toward, so I don’t have to try no more 
Cause all the hustle and the hurry ain’t really been working 
So I’mma take my time and synthesize what I been learning 
Man I just wanna let the art flow out 
Without the thoughts in my head ever slowing me down 
So I’ll take the essentials and eliminate the rest 
By the time the cycle finishes, I’ll be at my best, yeah 
This the current situation at hand 
I’m just trying to figure out the next step of the plan 
There’s a lot I haven’t told you and it’s not okay 
So let’s plan to catch up in about eighty days

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